Never Want to Run Again

Published June 5, 2011 by Jasmine

So today was set to be my longest run yet…10 miles. However, it only ended up being 9.78 miles as my calculations were a bit off. I wasn’t really looking forward to it, but it was a necessary evil to prepare me for my first half-marathon on July 4. I was having issues before I even left the house.  It took me at least five minutes to get my HRM (heart rate monitor) to work, and I just replaced the battery in the chest strap about a month ago. It is so frustrating!!  It even stopped a few times while I was running.  Does anyone know if there is a HRM that does not utilize a chest strap? I know I saw a cheap one at Target that supposedly picked up your heart rate from your wrist, just not sure how reliable it is.  I really want to know if Garmin, Polar, or some of the other high tech HRM’s have something similiar to this.

I left the house later than I wanted to, and knew I would be slower today because of the sun and heat. What I didn’t count on was how absolutely exhausted I was going to feel, and how soon I was going to feel that way. I literally was ready to quit before I even hit a mile.  It had to be something more than the heat because when I got home and checked the temperature it was only 72 degrees.  The problem is that I don’t know what was wrong today. It is quite possible that I have gotten to the point where my body will no longer sustain these runs without me eating. I know people are probably going to want to scream at me, but I have never eaten before any run or workout. I have discovered that this just works best for my body. I have had stomach and digestion issues my whole life so eating before running does not appeal to me.  I think it is time for me to start experimenting with some gels to see if it makes a difference in the energy I have and how I feel, before the 4th!

I literally think I could have cried this entire run, as all I wanted to do was quit. I couldn’t let myself cry because that would have made it easier for me to feel sorry for myself, quit, and turn around and go home. I couldn’t let myself do that though because come time for the marathon there is no turning around and going home.  So come hell or high water I needed to do these 10 miles even if I had to walk the entire time. In fact, I never ran for more than five minutes at a time today. By about mile seven I had drank all of my water…this was not good. I was SO THIRSTY! I was so desperate I contemplated going into the gas station to see if I could get a bottle of water, and I would come back and pay when I got home. (Note to self: carry some money with me next time, just in case.) By mile nine I was so exhausted I was only running 30 seconds and then walking 30 seconds.

By the grace of God I made it back home…completely soaked. I think I lost 3-4 pounds in sweat! It sure felt good to sit down.  I was so thirsty I drank about 1.5 liters of water before getting back up. My time was nothing to brag about, but it was good enough for me.  I was four seconds faster than minimum marathon pace. Considering this was my most miserable run ever, I am shocked that I was even within minimum marathon pace (even if only by 4 seconds per mile).

After finishing my run this morning, I never wanted to run again. I know I will, in fact, next Sunday is 12 miles. At this point, I am kind of questioning my sanity…who wants to run 12 miles? I am questioning whether I will really do the full marathon in October, I just don’t think I have it in me. I guess I have some to time to see what I am made of.  At this point I am not sure if it is my body or my mind that is struggling. Every time I wanted to quit today, and there were many, I reminded myself that “the rough is only MENTAL.”  Is it? I would like to believe so.

So for all you runners out there, how do you get through your run when all you want to do is quit? Or am I the only one who ever feels that way?


2 comments on “Never Want to Run Again

  • First off, CONGRATS on a HUGE accomplishment. 10 miles is a BIG deal. And 10 miles in heat and without proper feul/hydration is an even bigger deal. So be proud!

    You will be back out there next week. And your 12 miles will suck. But you know what, next time you “only” have to run 10 miles it will seem like a piece of cake. Then your 14 miles will suck. But the next time you “only” have to run 12 miles it will be a piece of cake. And on and on. 🙂

    I could write a book responding to all your questions! I hope you don’t think I’m obnoxious. I just remember being exactly where you were just a few years ago and I am happy to share my knowledge/experience. Just let me know when to shut up. 🙂

    Fuel: You need to start working fuel in to your runs, probably before the half marathon. For sure for the marathon. So you may as well start now. I am the Queen of stomach issues. I don’t eat or drink before my morning runs of up to 12 miles. Anything over 12 miles and I usually have a bagel 1 hour before (empty the digestive system; TMI, I know), then I have a gu or gel every 4 or 5 miles. For a half marathon you probably would just need to eat a little before the race and then do 1 gel at about mile 6. Maybe take gatorade at the waterstops. Marathon fueling you will DEFINITELY need carbs/electrolytes every 45 minutes or so. Too much to write here, but I’ll try to do an informational post on my own blog soon. 🙂

    HRM. I have a garmin one. I’ve never needed to change a battery in it. I’m not sure it even has one (in the chest strap). I have issues with the chest strap falling down because it doesn’t get quite small enough. I’ve found that running it under water first, to create suction, helps.

    The sun and heat, even just at 72, definitely played a big part in your difficult run today. Do some research on the internet and you’ll see that anything over 60 degrees slows down marathon pace by a certain amount (I can’t remember how many minutes or seconds or whatever it is a degree, but it is “proven” that temps over 60 slow the normal people down). With the full sun, your run was bound to be tough.

    I’ve found that on hot days like this I need to get up ultra early and get the runs done. I’m usually out the door by 5:30 on weekends to get done by 8:00/8:30. Delaying it too much longer makes for sucky runs. You can always nap. 🙂

    I think that’s it for now. Sorry to be so long!

    Rest up! And congrats!

  • I’m back again. 🙂 I realized I didn’t answer how I get through the runs I want to quit. I get through them, now, because I HAVE quit runs in the past and I ALWAYS regret it (later, when I’m sitting on the couch thinking that I wish I had toughed it out, etc.) But I NEVER regret finishing a tough run. I’m always super encouraged that I was able to mentally and physically hang in there and get it done. So, when I am in a run that I want to quit, I remind myself that I will regret quitting and tell myself to just hang in there for 5 more minutes, or 1 more mile, or whatever, and then reassess. Then when the 5 minutes (or whatever) is up, I tell myself to just give it a little more and reassess. Baby steps. Til your done.

    I was at an event this weekend listening to Scott Jurek (THE most bad a$$ ultra runner) talk. His words of wisdom on getting through tough runs was “don’t look at the big picture. Don’t look at having 15 more miles to go. Look at the immediate future – put one foot in front of the other and just get through it one mile at a time.” He WINS 100 mile races through deserts. Smart man with smart advice!

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